By: Dashboard Confessional

Title: Hands Down


Breathe in for luck,
breathe in so deep,
this air is blessed,
you share with me.
This night is wild,
so calm and dull,
these hearts they race,
from self control.
Your legs are smooth,
as they graze mine,
we're doing fine,
we're doing nothing at all.

My hopes are so high,that your kiss might kill me.
So won't you kill me,so I die happy.
My heart is yours to fill or burst,to break or bury,or wear as jewelery,
which ever you prefer.

The words are hushed lets not get busted;
just lay entwined here, undiscovered.
Safe in here from all the stupid questions.
"hey did you get some?"
Man, that is so dumb.
Stay quiet, stay near,
stay close they can't hear...
so we can get some.

My hopes are so high that your kiss might kill me.
So won't you kill me, so I die happy.
My heart is yours to fill or burst,to break or bury, or wear as jewelery,
which ever you prefer.

Hands down this is the best day I can ever remember,
I'll always remember the sound of the stereo,
the dim of the soft lights,
the scent of your hair that you twirled in your fingers
and the time on the clock when we realized it's so late
and this walk that we shared together.
The streets were wet and the gate was locked so I jumped it,
and I let you in.
And you stood at your door with your hands on my waist
and you kissed me like you meant it.
And I knew that you meant it,
that you meant it,
that you meant it,
and I knew,
that you meant it,
that you meant it.


This is one of my favourite song of all time. Just love it. And this phrase, from the song, is for you: "My heart is yours to fill or burst, to break or bury, or wear as jewelery, whichever you prefer." Hehe.

Hanging There...
6:42 PM

Crashed my school's prom last night. Haha. Me & Zal met up at 7.30pm & headed for Sheraton towers, where it was held. It was slightly better then last year, mainly because this year the organizers managed to hire an MC. Other than that, it was more or less the same as my prom last year. Took loads of pictures there, & ate the food too. Hehe. As usual everyone looked grand. It was fun man. And they had a better doorgift then ours. Haha. Cool. Before the dance, everyone had to stand up for the school song, and guess what, they played Glenninah & Frankie's remix of the school song. Haha. Cool man. And Rafi won the Prom King award. Haha. Kayu! Jkjk. Zal & me left at 11.20pm, just in time for the last train. Great night man. Kudos to the organizing committee. It was a splendid Prom.

Oh yah, earlier on yesterday, i went to Safe Megasale & bought an MP3. Muahahahaha. That's one item down on my wishlist. Heh.

So today, went to Parkway Parade to collect my pics which my sis helped to develop. Went there alone. Bored man. Lucky got my new MP3. Haha. I don't know why, but i just feel cheerful when i woke up. Haha. Gonna go to my aunt's house at Yishun later tonight with my mother & siblings. So, that's all for today. Adios.

Hanging There...
6:23 PM

I really want to say out what i'm feeling right now to you. But it's so difficult for me to meet up with you. You always can't make it these few days. And sometimes msges unanswered. No calls. Call when there's a problem. I don't even understand what the problem was. I'm feeling too lazy to even msg you because it might go unanswered. You're always on my mind. I still have lots & lots of feelings for you. But for the time being, my mind seems like imploding from holding back all my thoughts. I can't wait for school to reopen, because then i will have lots of distractions & things to do. I'm tired of being cheerful when i'm with my friends, but at the end of the day in bed, all the thoughts just rushes back through my mind and making me stay awake even when i'm tired and want to sleep.

But thanx to Aush, though his words of advice was short, it meant alot to me. I'm just suddenly inspired. He's endured the torment of waiting waaaay longer then me & he's still patient. I'm suddenly very inspired. I guess i'll just wait for you to msg me or call me or something. I really miss you but i guess you don't miss me. So i'll just wait. Thanx so much Aush, i guess i owe u one. Or two. I think i owe you a lot. Heh. Adios.

Hanging There...
4:19 PM

Monday 22/11/04

Met Yan in the morning. He rushed me till i forgot to bring my digicam. Nvm. Met up with half of the guys at tamp, then the rest at Hougang. There was about 15 of us. Around that number ah. You look beautiful as always. Went to visit about 11 houses. Great day man. Eat at almost every house. Haha. Had a short talk with you at the end of the day. I'll wait for forever.

Tuesday 23/11/04

Woke up at noon. Straight away msged Rafi. How could you start without me man. Haha. Met up with Rafi, Ewul & Mizi at Faezah's house at bout 2pm. Went to 6 girl's house, & slacked at Ewul's house lastly. Before the last house, we climbed a bit. Haha. Then at one of the house there was a dog barking out of nowhere. Shocked the four of us like hell. Haha. Oh yah, bumped into an old friend, Tajuddin, at tamp. Another fine day.

Wednesday 24/11/04

Woke up at 11am. Reached Bedok station at 12.05pm & none of them are there yet. Standard. Haha. Met up with Buk, ASP Mimi, Ria, Marziah & Khairul. Visited about 7 houses. Last house was Khairul's, at Woodlands. We left his house at 11.20pm. Took the MRT to Jurong East & got stuck there. Haha. No more MRT service at midnight. Damn. No more bus service also. So me, Buk, ASP Mimi & Marziah were stranded at Jurong East interchange. Ain't that great. In the end Marziah managed to convince her brother to come fetch us. So we had to wait for him to come. Loitered around for a while. Then we slacked near the MRT control station. We sang, we fooled around till a homeless guy who was sitting nearby walked off. Haha. Let out some of my feelings. Sometimes it feels great to just release whatever you're feeling. So finally her brother reached Jurong, & we took a ride to her house. At her house, near Afghanistan at tamp, ASP Mimi took a cab home. So left only Buk & me. Oh yah, bumped into Ilyas & shift_KOSONG at one of the coffee shop's there. Lepak je korang. Haha. It was 2am by then, no bus, so me & Buk walked home to Pasir Ris. Did some catching up along the way. We split ways at Central. Reached home at about 3am. Now i know how long it takes to walk from Afghanistan at tamp to my house. Damn shagged. But again, it was another fun day.

Thursday 25/11/04

Woke up at 10am. Met up with everyone at 10.50am at WS McD. Boarded the bus. Wakakakaka. We rented a bus for the day. Covered about 17 houses. There was about 25 of us present. It was a great day, eating & eating, taking pics & videos here & there, but there were 2 incidences which occured. One was at Fee's house, but he came down, so we calmed down & carried on like usual. But the second time, near Aush's place, he did it again. This time it was worst. Some neighbours saw & called the police. But it took so long for the police to come. The girls were at Aush's block, & most of the guys were around him. Some of the guys were at ground floor. I wonder why he did this. He's being to emotional. We wanted to get him down but were afraid if it turns out worst, so all we could do was shout to him & pray that he gets down. Its something i don't ever want to experience again. Seeing a friend there, doing that thing he did. My heart was beating like mad. Aush was stressed out that he just sat by a wall and kept quiet. The police came. Then he kept saying he wants her. So we called her to come there. Then he finally came down. So all the guys went to Aush's void deck while the police talked to him & bring him down. I almost cried when i saw her hugging his mum. Aush didn't hold back his tears. We all finally went to Aush's place while the police settled the matter. All i can say is that it is during this sort of time when we see who our true friends are, and it is obvious that everyone present at that moment was one. I sincerely hope & pray that things will turn out better for him & her. I guess this is also a lesson for everyone. Friends are there for each other through the ups & downs of life, so if anyone has any problem or is feeling down, go find your close friends & let it out instead of keeping it to yourselves.

And i just want to say that i love all my friends. To my close guy & gal friends from secondary school, i really treasure our friendship, cause i might have turn out to be a different person if i had been with the wrong crowd. I love you guys man. And to my poly friends, espcially that 5 malay coursemates of mine, i love you all too. I really love u all, and if i ever hurt any of your feelings, be it intentional or not, forgive me. I'm only human, & its normal for a human to make mistakes. I love all my friends!!!!

One more thing, credits to Aush for organizing this outing. Thanx dude! All of us really bonded during this get-together.

Friday 26/11/04

And finally today. Woke up at noon. Called you straight away cause didn't contact you for two days. I dunno what i'm feeling right now. I meet you & let out how i feel, but its just so difficult to meet up with you. Haiz. Went out for solat Jumaat. Went to TM with Malikedudin, Fair, Yo & Mail. Then i went off to school for a while to use the comp, so here i am now. Took almost an hour to finish this looooooong entry. K ah. I wanna go to Malikedudin's house to eat. Surely the food damn nice. Because its free! Wakakakakakaka. Adios. Taking Care everyone.

Hanging There...
5:15 PM

What a match man.. Barca is simply superb.. Real Madrid played like Ipswich Town.. Haha.. Beckham was lousy as usual.. Zidane had few touches.. Ronaldo & Raul was kept quiet.. Figo was tighly marked.. Carlos made a mistake.. Yup, Barca is definitely the a strong team.. Salgado had a lot of trouble marking rabbit-teeth Ronaldinho.. Blood hell this guy.. What he eat or do sia until his soccer is so magnificient.. The first goal was a miscommunication between Carlos & Casillas.. Carlos let the harmless cross from Ronaldinho roll to Casillas, and Eto'o came in between them like lightning & dribbled passed Casillas to make it 1-0.. Then the second goal.. Again the architect is the rabbit-teeth guy..made a pass in between two defenders to Deco,who passed the ball to Gio who slot it in to make it 2-0 at the break.. And the last goal, Eto'o dribbled all the way from the half-line to the penalty box,only to be sandwiched by Walter Samuel & Guti, thus conceding a penalty.. Ronaldinho converted the penalty.. 3-0.. Simply superb.. Barca had most of the possesion.. Puyol was a superb figure at the back.. And the match kept comparing the reactions of Ronaldinho & Ronaldo.. This is even better then Man Utd vs ARSEenal man..

Defender of the Match- C. Puyol

Player of the Match- Ronaldinho

Moment(s) of the Match- Ronaldinho showing the thumbs up to the linesman for marking him offside

Hanging There...
6:54 AM

Timetable is out! Thanx to General for helping me retrieve my timetable, cos everyone else can't seem to get it.. Man, mon & thurs i end at 7 pm!! wth man.. at least weds & fris end early.. Lets see what subj i take.. E-device,E. Maths 2, Biochem, Bio Fund, Java programming, TCS & PSPS 2.. And i got Intro to Wireless Communication for CDS.. My first choice.. Don't ask me why i chose this subj.. Cos i dunno also.. Haha.. Mebbe cos the CU is 4.. Heh.. How man.. I'll be late for rock climbing training every mon cos skool finish at 7pm.. Damn.. Next sem is gonna be one long sem..

Hanging There...
1:57 AM

Finally went out juz now..went to Malikedudin's open at bout 3pm..met Haidir, Fair, Akram & Fee there.. Atai came late..After eating the 5 of us w/out Atai went to Huda's house.. Then Atai joined us and we went to Alyaa's house..Alyaa, ape ni nak chat pon segan2.. nak call pon boleh.. haha.. niwaes,by this time, semue dah malas nak jalan, so they went home,xcept me & Atai.. We went to Nuraz's house.. Atai step malu je tapi ikut jugak.. haha.. Wah Nuraz ur house quiet grand, tvs & chairs & helmets here and there.. and u so quiet down there.. at her house the two of us ate again.. Went off at bout 7.30pm.. Atai went home.. I went shopping for a while , while waiting for Aush.. Bought a Levi's jeans.. wakakakakaka.. tak tau nak simpan duit ar ni budak.. Met Aush at tp busstop.. and met Shakir.. long time no see him.. went to his house.. also open house.. so that means, eat again.. wakakakakakaka.. chilled in his room for a while b4 finally heading home.. i wanna go out again tmr ar.. anyone please ask me out?

Hanging There...
11:52 PM

Why is hari raya so boring these few days.. been staying at home.. yesterday played soccer in the afternoon..feel kind of tired..dunno why man.. but i'm still gonna play soccer later.. so boring at home.. feeling kind of down too.. msges going unreplied.. everything is so uncertain.. haiz.. next week is gonna be the week man..i'm hoping for the best..

Hanging There...
4:33 PM

First of all..i'd like to wish all my muslim frens Selamat Hari Raya!! alamak..dah tengah mlm baru nak wish eh..takperlah eh..started the day by going to istighfar to solat aidil fitri..reached there at 7.40am..damn packed already..waited for the second round of solat..saw Rafi Ali there.. haha.. for those who dunno who he is,he's a veteran national s'pore player..or ex-national..i dunno lah..not up to date with local soccer.. heh.. niwaes, on the way to the mosque, saw one guy wearing baju kurung full suit,but the pants is tappered..mapek sak!!!! ape sak baju kurung sluar tappered..ridiculous man..oh well,as wakrak wud say, suke hati kau lah ramlee..haha.. after solat raya,went home to haf breakfast before going off to visit relatives.. but before that, me and my siblings asked for forgiveness from our parents..hehe.. baik eh kite.. wakakakakakaka.. didn't really visit much houses..reached home at bout 11pm juz now.. k ah.. i need some sleep man..oh yah before that, kalau saye ade buat silap salah ke,tersinggung hati sesiape ke,pokoknye ape2 kesalahan lah terhadap sesiape yg kenali saye..saye mintak maaf ye..maaf zahir dan batin..slamat malam..adios..

Hanging There...
12:06 AM

Harlu everyone..went out with Ali during the day..went to Parco Bugis..bought a long sleeve shirt..heh.. didn't do much today..only iron my clothes..my mother cooked all the food..damn delicious man.. hehe.. Now watching Salam Lebaran on Suria.. k lah..that's it for tonite.. adios..

Hanging There...
10:12 PM

Wah yesterday tiring sia..wipe the window, wipe the grill, wipe the fan, mop the floor, tidy my room, do the curtains, bring out the new carpet, while watching holywood bolywood at nite..haha! took the whole day to clean the house sia..eh Yasser Arafat passed away man!! Wad's gonna happen to Palestine..

Hanging There...
11:46 AM

Went for climbing juz now..only got a few of us at the gym..the seniors organised an internal comp..only got four freshies..i got first place wakakakakakaka..but my arm pumped sia..so long never climb..den after climbing go for bubble tea as usual..i love climbing..

Hanging There...
3:47 PM

Went to break fast at johor yest..reached home at 12.50am..After sahur flat all the way till 2.30pm sia juz now..haha..Went break fast at Johor with Ali, Imran, White, Black, Sufi, Jeep, Cumshot, Fadzillah,Noor,Xinxiu,Nyssa & Wani..The 3 Chinese girls xtra sia..haha jk only lah! Met Ali, Imran, Noor, White, Jeep & Xinxiu at Tamp interchange..then met the rest at Woodlands interchange..Took 170 to Johor..At Johor we split up,cos some of them had smth to buy..Me , White, Imran & Nyssa took a cab to the place where we're gonna eat,which is Anjong Warisan.. But the prob is..the driver dunno where's the place sia!! Basket..spent almost an hour in the cab.. Lousy lah u Nyssa..can't remember the place..haha! had to stop & ask ppl for directions like 4 or 5 times sia..by the time we reach the place its 7.30pm already..& the rest reach 5 mins later..then finally we eat!! Its a nice place..sit on the floor eat..but got table ah..the restaurant is built among trees sia..nice..then after eating..its shisha time..haha..slacked all the way till bout 10.30pm, with Imran as the main joker.. haha....oh ya, celebrated Nyssa's birthday..happy birthday to you.. when we were going off, the 4 cabs we called were almost half an hour late sia..basket..finally reached S'pore at bout midnight..no more bus..so we had to take cabs.. deciding who take with who took up almost half an hour again..laugh here & there..haha..mapek ah lu White..take cab go KL.. haha.. finally 3 of us Noor, Sufi & me took one cab..reach home at 12.50am.. it was fun man..but i wish more ppl came.. nvm next year organise again ah Sufi & Noor!! K ah..gonna go for rock climbing later..adios..

Hanging There...
9:15 AM

Harlu..i juz woke up..yest went for a haircut at bedok wif Yan n Co...4 of us all cut our hair,xcept Ahmad..My hair short seh..not nice..haiz..Then went to break fast at Ya Salam..Ate masalah thosai..damn full sia..haha..After terawih went to chill at Istanbul..wah so far ar..heh..k ah..wanna shower and get ready for Solat Jumaat..oh ya,since the tagboard ain't working,if anyone got anything to say,please type it out at comments yah..and do leave behind ur name..heh..adios..

Hanging There...
3:55 AM

Hey..waited for someone's msg whether i can go with the person to Geylang..but the msg didn't come..disappointed..haiz..nvm..lucky Bashfurk got plans for the day..went to skool at bout 4pm..met up with Bashfurk,Fariz,BuLLu,Fak & Syed..Lepak at lib while 3 of em studied..Then 4 of us me,Fariz,Fak & Bashfurk went to buke at Masjid Khalid..Buke Kacang pool seh..haha..after solat terawih we had a tour ard Geylang..a bit packed ah..boring ah Geylang..haha..must go somewhere else next time..

Hanging There...
3:41 PM